An open letter to Sir J

I regret ever asking permission to give you the address of this blog, but its just as well - I know you have never read it, and that tells me something important. The same thing it tells me to realise that, when you contact me, it is never to "catch up" but always because you want something. And that when we "talk", it is always about you.

You really know nothing about me, for someone that I have called a friend. The things you think you know say more about yourself than me. I used to try and convey to you the seriousness of my commitment to Master and the depth of my submission, but as much as you'd say you understand, it was always clear that not only do you understand nothing, but you don't even care to. Do you take nothing seriously that is not your own?

And what is your own, you take far too seriously. Your sub's behaviour is utterly reprehensible. As a sub, I am disgusted at her. And every time you say that she is still "the perfect submissive" its a slap in the face for me, for my Sista, and for any one of us with an ounce of loyalty. Your tolerance for it astonishes me... but then again, maybe I shouldn't be surprised. It was never easy to respect you as my Dom when it was so obvious that you were being played - I shouldn't have bothered, and thankfully I didn't for long. For an intelligent man, you are not very smart. Now I just thank my lucky stars to have found a Master who has more pride than that.... and who appreciates the qualities I have to offer.

Yes, I am angry - at your self-centredness, and lack of care to even pay the slightest attention to anything going on around you. But I am grateful for that in a way, too, so I can rest assured that you won't ever have the satisfaction of knowing..........................

Of course, I know the one I am most angry at is myself, for being stupid enough to be sucked in by your charm. For an intelligent woman, I am not always very smart. But unlike you, I know exactly what I've got, and what is worth holding on to.